FRIDAY FUNNIES

Hospital Ride

Two paramedics were dispatched to check on a 92-year-old man who had become disoriented. They decided to take him to the hospital for evaluation.

En route, with siren going, they questioned the man to determine his level of awareness. Leaning close, one asked, “Sir, do you know what we’re doing right now?”

The old man slowly looked up at him, then gazed out the ambulance window.

“Oh,” he replied, “I’d say about 50, maybe 55.”

Who Can You Trust?

A burglar decided to burgle the safe in a store. On the safe door he was very pleased to find a note reading, “Please don’t use dynamite. The safe is not locked. Just turn the knob.” He did so.

Instantly a heavy sandbag fell on him, the entire premises were floodlighted, and alarms started clanging.

As the police carried him out on a stretcher, he was heard moaning, “Can’t trust nobody no more!”

Wrong Way

It was New Year’s Day 1929. The University of California at Berkeley was playing Georgia Tech in college football’s Rose Bowl. Roy Riegels, a California defender, recovered a Georgia Tech fumble, then turned and scampered sixty-five yards in the wrong direction!

One of Riegel’s own teammates tackled him just before he reached the wrong goal line. On the next play, Georgia Tech scored and went on to win.

From that day on, Riegels was saddled with the nickname “Wrong-way Riegels.” For years afterward, whenever he was introduced, people would exclaim, “I know who you are! You’re the guy who ran the wrong way in the Rose Bowl!”

Our failures may not be as conspicuous, but we’ve all gone the wrong way, and we have memories that haunt us. Recollections of sin and failure rise up to taunt us at three o’clock in the morning. If only we could forget! If only we could begin again!

We can. When we confess our sins and repent before God, He forgives our past and puts it away. In Christ, “we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins”—all our sins (Colossians 1:14; 2:13).

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