Pray for My Hearing
The stranger approached the pastor after service and said, “I’d like you to pray for my hearing.” The pastor placed his hands on the man’s ears and said a passionate, earnest prayer. “How’s your hearing now?” the pastor asked. Looking surprised, the man said, “Well, it’s not until tomorrow.” (Court Hearing)
After the Preaching on the Devil
Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a strong preaching on the devil. One said to the other, “What do you think about all this Satan stuff?” The other boy replied, “Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It’s probably just your dad.”
Name Calling
Fed called a church and asked to speak to the Head Hog of the Trough. Secretary: How rude! I’ll have you know we would NEVER EVER refer to our pastor as a hog. Fred: Okay, then just take a message. Tell him I’ve come into a bit of money so I was calling to give your church $50,000. Secretary: Well hold the phone, dearie! I think I see that big fat pig coming down the hall right now.