Here is your sign: A local priest and pastor stood by the side of the road holding up a sign that said, “The End is Near! Turn yourself around now before it’s too late!”
They planned to hold up the sign to each passing car. “Leave us alone, you religious nuts!” yelled the first driver as he sped by.
From around the curve they heard a big splash. “Do you think,” said one clergy to the other, “we should just put up a sign that says BRIDGE OUT’ instead of holding this sign?”
The Sweet Grandmother
The following can be read out by one person, or acted out by two, quite funny and true sometimes!
A sweet grandmother telephoned St. Josephs Hospital. She timdly asked “Is it possible to speak to
someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?”
OPERATOR – I’ll be glad to help, dear, What’s the name and room number of the patient?
GRANDMOTHER – Norma Findlay Room 302
OPERATOR – Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse’s station for that room.
After a few minutes the operator returned to the phone
OPERATOR – I have good news – Her nurse just told me that Noma is doing well. Her blood pressure is
fine, her blood test just came back normal and her Physician Dr Cohen has scheduled her to be
discharged tomorrow.
GRANDMOTHER – Thank you, That’s wonderful. I was so worried. God bless you for the good news.
OPERATOR – You’re more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?
GRANDMOTHER – No- I’m Norma Findlay in Room 302 and no one tells me anything. Thanks again.
THE CURE
A man walks into a pharmacy and asks an assistant if she can give him something for the hiccups.
The Assistant promptly reaches out and slaps the mans face.
“What did you do that for?” the man asks.
“Well, you don’t have the hiccups anymore do you?” says the assistant.
The man replies “No, but my wife does, and she’s outside in the car”